Note: All names, ranks and countries in this article are fictional. Any similarity to reality is a coincidence.
For this edition of the Tip.It Times, we have an interview with Barack Obama about his Runescape career. Take a seat and enjoy the interview.
Well Barack - I can call you Barack right? - when did you first discover Runescape? And when did you discover Tip.It?
You may call me Barack, Mr. Editor. And I first discovered Runescape in 2002. In 2006, I discovered Tip.It, got in touch with some Admins and that's where my political career started.
Yes, you're not supposed to talk about that -.-
Do you have any goals set in Runescape at the moment?
I do actually. Right now, I'm trying to get 25 million coins. Not easy when you don't have the government backing you. And Jagex is located in England :( Also, I'm trying to run for president!
Erm... We don't have to elect a president in Runescape?
The hell? You have to be kidding me?! Then why have I been yelling in the Varrock and Falador Town Squares for the past four weeks?
I don't know...
Merde! There will be elections in Runescape! Yes, we can! And I will lower the taxes in Runescape! Yes, I will!
There are no taxes in Runescape either.
Aw, C'mon! You're breaking my heart here! Then what should my program look like? And why did I always pay taxes to some guy?
I don't know... I'm just a reporter. And you've been scammed. Can we continue now? Are you proud with what you've achieved so far?
I'm the president of the Unites States of America.
Yes, I know that. I mean on Runescape.
Oh, right. I'm very proud at what I've achieved. I couldn't do it without Tip.It! Their guides are awesome and without them, I wouldn't be where I am now.
God! Didn't I just tell you not to talk about that?!
Oh, yes, I'm sorry.
Geez, where did we get this guy from? Are you in some kind of clan?
I am the president of the United States of America.
That's a clan.
*Sigh* Yes, we know that already. Thank you for pointing that out. Again. I meant Runescape Clan.
Well, I've started my own political clan, but since there are no elections...
Yes. We're glad there are no elections.
I guess you don't understand how important elections are. Let me tell you the importance of elec...
No, thank you. With you being the president, do you have much time left to play Runescape?
Sometimes I have some free time. But often, I have to shop and cook for Michelle, then I have some of my loyal staff to train for me.
You know that's forbidden right?
What? Since when?
Erm... Since the start, I think.
God, what else don't I know about this game. Change! We need change! It is time for change!
Okay, calm down. Geez... If there is anything you could change about Runescape, what would it be?
We need elections! And taxes!
*Sigh* Why did I even bother asking?
Is there any update you hated/liked?
Well, many disliked the trading limit, but ever since that limit, I didn't have to pay taxes anymore.
Right, to that scammer.
I really thought there were taxes... You see, it's important to have taxes because without taxes, we'd be...
We don't care, it's a freaking game -.- I think this concludes the interview. Is there anything you'd like to say?
Yes, I'd like to thank Tip.It again for helping me become president. Without their help, I wouldn't be where I am now. The way you used your connections is an inspi...
Aaagh! I can't take it anymore! What's wrong with this guy? I'm through!